My favorite NYC entrepreneurs: the guy who invented the little brown bag for “roadies” and the $3 throw-away umbrella.

Ever see how excited a little kid gets during his first ride on the train? Compare that to how you feel now. Cheer up – it’s not that bad.

For those of you not from NY – B&T is not a sandwich without the lettuce. This is a derogatory term used for kids from Long Island, New Jersey, and Connecticut who take the “bridge and tunnels” into Manhattan to party. As a former B&T’er, I wear this tag proudly. But thankfully I will never need wait in Penn Station for the “5:15” ever again.

Why is it that the Port Washington line is the only one lucky enough to bypass Jamaica Station in Queens? Anyone on Long Island knows…Jamaica station is a complete clusterf–k. Port Wash should have to experience the pain too.

No fair.

Definition of fauxcellalarm from urbandictionary.com:

When you feel the vibration of your cell phone, but it is not vibrating (or you are not even carrying your phone).

I’m glad there is finally a word for this. I thought I was f—ing crazy.

There is a NYC yellow cab with phat, shiny rims. This may be the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever seen. The rims don’t spin (that would just be ridiculous).

Just a bit of advice: only use the bathroom in NY Penn Station in an emergency, and you have no other options. Or… if for some reason you were wondering what Mark Renton felt like in Trainspotting.

When throwing your jacket onto the overhead storage rack, please take the change out of your pockets first. Getting nailed on the top my head with falling quarters really hurts.

Thank you.

Scrambling for empty seats on a bus or train reminds me of an adult version of musical chairs…only without the music, fun, and laughter.

The best part of the New York Subway system, by far, is the moment the 4 train emerges from the underground tunnel to the immediate the view of sunshine over Yankee Stadium at 161st Street. It’s a great sight.